ANTU in a form of ART itself

UNTITLED....my dad use to say

2012-01-19T19:26:00.000-08:00

my late dad use to say

"you are, what you belive in"

and he always ask me

"tell me what/who are you?"

and i replied

"unique"

and he ask me where do i know that word and what is unique

i said i learnt it from asia bagus and najib kept telling that thier are looking for someone unique

so i want to be 'that' person

i want to be unique

and my dad just smile

(a true story, i was only 6 back then)

=D i still belive i am until now

UNTITLED...ayuh bercinta sampai ke tua

2012-01-16T04:44:00.000-08:00

if you wish to grow old and still be in love with your partner,
then watch this
http://youtu.be/DR6j-L_v1i8
the cutest thing ever

UNTITLED...megan who?

2012-01-11T19:13:00.000-08:00

told you she was hot.
and she still is.

UNTITLED....when u look back

2012-01-07T12:20:00.000-08:00

2 years ago, we were part of something special...

and yup, we still are...

thanks for coming you guys.
najee for at least coming although he forgotten it -.-" and spare a lil moment to lepak
abel whom i beg to leave his books,spare 2 hours lepak with us, as his finals was just around the corner
adlan whom came straight after work and his mom called me as she was worried the 'naughty lil boy' didnt pick up his mama's call
lavin whom got 'kebas bontot' riding his bike from usj to mk
jk whom came earlier and never miss the chance to gobble lamb burger
kitin whom came late becoz she was busy jogging and lost track of time (kitin jogs?)
dila whom was among the last to reply my msg but was the most enthusiastic wanting to go and have good old lamb burger
and of course my baby isky....

...whom always be by my side
i know how much you hate people celebrating ur birthday, but i didnt intend to, it just so happen that it was at the right time and place

Happy Birthday my baby
may all your hopes and dreams come true
and all the happiness and blessings to you
<3

UNTITLED...opening to my new year

2012-01-03T20:15:00.000-08:00

before i tend to be a forgetful granma
i would like to wish all the readers (i dunno whos reading this)
Happy New Year!

today i open msn news to read
and honestly, when it comes to gossip and celebrity,
i would normally just buat bodoh

but this time its different

it makes me click on the news to find out more

yup, its about kathy and brand

(bet u guys think i'm all girly wirly)

well, actually, i love to see any couple being in love
especially the special power couples

i like mr and mrs genne simmons, i like family guy (does that count?) i like juliana and bill, Dr M and asmah and many more.

and this split up, for the 1st time, makes me sad =(

i thought they were great together

but then again, who am i to judge, they probably need the split more than the eyes of the public can see it.

which brings me to today

today is the 4th of January 2012

6 month i have been with isky
6 solid month
i have been dating and seeing my yum yum yummy isky

and God, i am truly grateful

the patients, understanding, his views, his courage, his hearts, his love

everything about him is so amazing. i dunno how to describe it

i have been in and out of relationship so many times. not to mention numerous datings and set up before. to make things worst, i thought i had the best freaking love relationship and after breaking up, i had the believe that nothing can top that up.

and boy was i wrong.

i'm glad i ask you out for dinner and movie (although intentionally it wasnt for me)

the best,
yup, by far, the best ever

(the half year review is coming-up...hahahhahahaha....i hope i perform exceed than expectation on your side. I love you baby)

UNTITLED..legend has it

2011-12-15T02:25:00.000-08:00

legend has it that i am a boy trap in a girl's body

my boyfriend aint complaning

tralalalalala

UNTITLED...bill rancit

2011-12-14T19:08:00.000-08:00

i had dinner yesterday with few co-workers
it was a treat from our good friend
whom is going off next year
to a place that most people would least think of to work

most people would apply to work overseas,
typically
sydney, paris, new york, london, singapore, taipei, hong kong, and many more

but this guy,
he's going off to chicago

dang, chicago

its amazing that he could take that giant leap

all the best bro

"my big brother is working as leasing there, i'll be doing R&D. I'm gonna recommend you to do marketing, if there's a place, i'll roger you"

*hopes* chicago, here i come!

UNTITILED...nom-nom-nomming

2011-12-13T23:02:00.000-08:00

me eat spaghetti for breakfast

"nom-nom-nom"

UNTITILED...eat sugar and die

2011-12-12T21:08:00.000-08:00

did you say something?

no?

i thought so too

move along

p/s: negativity will consume and kill you. even if you're alone, doesnt mean you can built walls and throw words that make you feel a bit human.

you're pathetic. nough said.

=D smile, makes it a bit better.

UNTITLED....an old friend

2011-12-11T10:40:00.000-08:00

i got a phone call
the number wasnt save in my phone's memory
so i wasnt so sure to pick it up
normally i dont
but this time, i did

"Achot?" a girls voice at the end of the line.
"yup...."
"kenal tak sapa ni?"
"___m_h?"
"betul!"

its been ages since i heard about her
but i can recognize her voice
and only technic jb will call me that name

"wassup?" i asked
"can i see you?"
"are u in KL?"

for sure, she was in town

and we've meet up
along with my baby Isky, and my best fren Fatimah

and we talked
ever since she got married, it was all about her family and husband
she have put him first, and she concentrated on her marriage life

but i knew there was something that didnt sound right
she have come to KL, alone
and she talked about her husband all the time
on how she's here to buy him a present
on how busy he can be, that's y he's not with her

and one thing triggers to another

her husband was cheating on her, and she knows
her husband came clean
the girl confessed
and as crazy as it sounds
she forgive and, in a way, handled the situation by giving space and support to her husband, for him to think it thoroughly

man.....if it was me, i left that bugger's ass a long time ago

which reminds me the old days

back then i used to be in love with this guy
whom i thought have done great for me,
pick me up when i was at my lowest.
when nobody seem to be by my side, he was there
i loved him very much

but what i thought, if i look back, had harm me more than enough
yes, he raise his hand on me
used up all my money
love to tell whats good and whats bad for me
if i gone big, he would say that i'm fat and ugly
in fact, he would say that i am not beautiful at all
i would pick him up to go to college, supported his graduation things,
send him and pick him up from classes, buy him his toiletries
i even would starve to gave him the money to make him happy

oh yes, i was that foolish

and yes, when he raise his hand
i beat the crap out of him too

we were like this abusive couple
and got back together cos we loved each other too much
yeah, stupid as it sounds, the relationship lasted quite sometime

how it ended?

well, i do accept people for who they are
if you're sad, you think you're ugly, or you're making only a dime, a day
and if i say i love you,means i love u, i accept you for who you are

but it is totally insane
not right,not acceptable
when you have given it all
supported him
devoted to him

and he goes for another lady

believe me, leave his sorry ass

just pack ur bags and move on

it hurts,
boys it hurts

but to see that man with another girl
not appreciating for who u are
just let go

i have many guys who cheated on me when we're dating
4 of them if i'm not mistaken

what did i do?
i left them

but in my friend's case
she's marriage

damn
aint that hard.

Untitled... the love for children

2011-12-07T02:32:00.000-08:00

“Children are the world's most valuable resource and its best hope for the future”

-John Fitzgerald Kennedy

UNTITLED....hairy aisyah

2011-12-07T01:50:00.000-08:00

6 of the above, i have tried it....

wow

not bad.

UNTITLED....things were different

2011-12-06T06:59:00.000-08:00

such a pity
when i view my very dear friends evolve into something that i cant recognise no more

use to be one of the beautiful beings on earth
have a beautiful heart
and a beautiful soul

and somewhere along the journey on this earth

my friend change
into something
that i couldnt even comment
and saddens me when i think about it

well i can say,
partially it was my fault too
i had forgotten my promise

i had promise to my friend that we stayed friends

but i couldn't keep that promise
as we distance each other 4 feet away each hour

now,
its been a year since i meet my friend

and i miss that portion of life that i used to have

things was different back then
i know,
you can never forgive me
i know
cause i didnt kept my promise

i'm sorry

thing's changed
i changed

and you didnt kept your end of the bargain either

so hey,
we're even

i guess

i'm happy as i see that you're doing fine
very fine
you had achive some of your dreams
and live your life now, according to what you want

i'm happy that you're happy now

and i wish you all the best

thus, please dont be sad as i didnt kept my promise
you should have known better that i did try
and i strive until it tear me apart
where else you seem to be happy, living the life you always wanted

and now i'm happy
and yes, again, i'd tell ya
i've changed
i am happy

so as a friend, please respect it
as i have respect you left me here to bleed
and kept a promise that never meant anything to u in the 1st place

so if you are my true friend
leave me as it is
and let me shine brightly
i have found the man of my dreams

and you left me to pursue yours

wish you all the best in life
and pray you'll find the happiness you've always wanted

Amin.

UNTITLED....make me feel human

2011-12-03T07:36:00.000-08:00

'why do you do charity?'

do you really need a reason?

cos sometimes, you dont

thats the beauty of charity

and for all the reason in the world,

it is worth every second, penny and sweat.

even cooler when you share the same passion with others

bless all who supported charity
may your life will be filled with love, kindness and happiness
=D

UNTITLED...by far, the best one. by far

2011-12-01T03:40:00.000-08:00

came to my desk
just to clean-up before going back
thought of bukak fb kejap

open
got 2 notification
read
"isky meow added 2 photos of you"

oh...ok
so i click

bamb...keluar gambar gajah

and i laugh
weirdly as it sounds
i just laugh

my work,
its been challenging lately
a lot of stuff to do
and there are new things that pop-up today
which makes me more 'ayoyoyoyoyoy' than 'yay'

but the best freaking thing is that
no matter how shitty my day can be
i have this one chubby,yummy cat,
whom i feel belong to,
whom i feel i'm loved by,
whom i feel so safe and at home

and never,
never fail to make me smile

even if he's ten trillion miles away from malaysia

sorry guys, but this guy is the best so far.
top notch. the best so far.

UNTITLED...morning speaks reality

2011-11-30T17:40:00.001-08:00

can you please stab me to death

ayoyoyoyoyo

last nite i thought that today's friday
and tomorrow's saturday
and he's coming back

but nooooooooooooooo

when i woke up
i remembered that today was actually Thursday

curseeee youuuuuu

ayoyoyoyooy

2 more freaking endless nite

isky, i dunno what you did to me,
but seriuosly
i have gone mad at day 3

i cant bear it

i blame your cheesecake kangkang
i know u put mundrem on that thing and feed it to me

*tolak meja sesorang*

i can bearly open my eyes coming to work today.
i dunno why, i just cant sleep.
i need a hug

UNTITLED....so many ways to make yourself go wacko

2011-11-30T08:47:00.000-08:00

freaking three days i've been staying up late, waking up early.
my mind just cant rest, while my body aged like mad
i cant sleep
cant eat that much, in fact, sometimes i forgotten to eat
wow...man, wassup with me
feels like i passed this phase of time before

i know whats causing this
and it aint good
freaking shit it aint good
i stayed at work until night
dont wish to go back
when i go back i feel so lonely
in fact, although i'm in the middle of a buzzing crowd
i would still be lonely

today is Friday
the 1st of Dec
i have to patiently wait for tomorrow
my God
its killing me
i'm sure i'll be crying soon
when i see him, for sure i'll cry one

dang

i miss you too much

8days you're gone, you're driving me nuts

last time was japan
this time its aussie

remember the time i balik kg for raya, it was like 4 days
and we're like seksa to hell

fuck,
seriously
i thought i'm through with the whole miss, lovy dovy thing
i mean, i have a lot of ex
whom every ex i thought i loved and missed, and i'm gonna get married to

i thought i taste it all, and would be immune to such feeling

hell, i was wrong

dang....

=( baby, i miss you. very much
(12.56am)

UNTITLED...a lil bit of drug

2011-11-17T16:16:00.000-08:00

I never thought i be in love like this
when i look at you, my mind goes on a trip

its been more than 4 month already

who would have thought, huh?

i am truly blessed.

UNTTILED...tip of the iceberg

2011-11-10T02:58:00.000-08:00

pernah rasa nak terjun lombong tak?

me..
a few times already.

being positive is great

u try to never pull in the negativity in everything

but what if it will consume you
and spit you out

what if the output of such things will gobble the best of you

sometimes i tend to think

is my boss appreciating the skills that i have
or simply punishing me for the gift that i've got

*wonders*

its great working here.
no doubt.
great.
but when a new boss comes in, old ones goes....
u tend to doubt that greatness

i miss my old colleague....mawar, weng, hanafi, kak lina and cheryl.

and i definitely miss my old boss...who recently got promoted into being a bigger boss.

and i got a new boss

whom i wish that she is replace by my old boss, who is now the boss of my current boss.

dang...
how things can be very difficult.

sometimes i tend to wonder,
the reason why i have good relationship with tenant's, the security, the cleaners, suppliers and many others, is like a freaking curse.

and some people would love to take advantage of that
and end up
if its the wrong cause,
my bridge of relationship is burnt to ashes.

freaking fuck up hell

now i have to be the bad person?
hell no.

i'll be a bad person to one person
but not to many

i am willing to take that chance

and sending CV to a new working place makes me feel good

hey, a new positive era is coming.

i aint complaning

UNTITLED...still my husbands

2011-11-01T17:30:00.000-07:00

my second husbands

yum yum yummyyyyyy

UNTITLED...dang, she's hot

2011-10-19T04:09:00.000-07:00

shes hot

yup

shes hot

UNTITLED...my health

2011-10-16T21:24:00.000-07:00

due to my medication, yes, i'm putting on weight

not a bit

but a lot
am now 64kg.

ideal weight is 55-58kg.

60 above is consider over weight

wow

i'm over weight

kinda sad though, but i have to take my medication
if people were to ask me why i'm so fat

i just reply

'cos i have to be'

look guys, people can say you're fat
you're hugde
you're enormous

anything to make you just feel a bit tiny

what ever

to me, its all about you being comfortable with yourself

honestly, yes, i do feel i'm a bit too big,
but nothing or no such words can bring me down to a sad state

last time,yes
but this time around, no

the best freaking thing is that

he says that i still am gorgeus in so many ways
and he says that i can maintain the 62kg or loose it
he dont mind at all.
as long as i'm happy <--might sound too good to be true, but yes

i've had previous relationship whom i reached 60kg, he,he and he, would ask me to watch my diet.

but isky.....

its 2am,
"baby, i want ice cream...feel like muching ice cream"-after taking my medication
"no worries baby, i got plenty in my fridge..."

o.O how can i diet like this woooooooo

hohohohoho. i'm in love with isky and ice cream =D

UNTITLED...a beautiful weekend

2011-10-16T19:16:00.000-07:00

i am very thank full to God as the past weekend was a very,very beautiful and awesome one

spend a family day with my family

spend a night playing board games with old and new friends

spend the whole sunday with my baby

nothing beats family, baby and friends.

i am truly blessed.

now,
to take care of my weight and my health

so i can enjoy and looking forward to have another countless of beautiful moments together.

oh ya, to dipie,
happy birthday =D sorry i didnt get the chance to lepak with my crs frens.

you all still rawks and i miss you guys very much.

Have a blast one dipie!

UNTITLED....sumber inspirasi

2011-10-11T20:42:00.001-07:00

a twig engangement

kepada mereka yg suka simplicity but yet have designs in it

UNTITLED...things are just meant to be quiet

2011-10-05T03:37:00.001-07:00

hi, yup i know
its been a long time since i wrote anything
a bit too much time i guess
spora and fungus are growing they say

hmmm
what is it to talk about

havent quite actually have anything to say
or write

or better yet,
just to babble

any random subject?
nope, unfortunately no

right now i'm waiting for someone to pick me up

yes, u know who

yup here we go again
aisyah yg gelabah nak bebel pasal pakwe dia lagi

nope,
no i'm not gonna
but i did mention him above

i dunno what to say

kinda....
random for me to write atas angin

and yet you all are still reading this

wait,
what i was talking about just now

weird,
i didnt blog anything edu enough

hold on,
its a blog,
my blog, so i can chat what ever i want

but tell me
why are u reading this again?
and why am i writing this post up?

hmmm weird
my head is in the clouds
and my heart is in heaven
my mind goed somewhere deep
and my brain just burst into fire

wow

u're still reading this

thanks babe

UNTITLED....semangat slim

2011-09-13T21:00:00.000-07:00

I havent lepak with a lot of people lately
due to puasa, raya, work and my health

i have to apologies if i cant see you, meet u, lepak with u, even return your msgs or calls

so they ask me, how am i been doing

i just replied

I AM 62KG....

AND I'M FREAKING LOVING IT =P

thank you for your support and concerns

i love my life, my family, my friends and the best additional thing in my life, my baby Isky, whom i love, adore and the most beautiful creature of all.

i love you very much =D

UNTITLED...gila bapak aku sedih

2011-09-08T01:30:00.000-07:00

a friend post this up in FB
i cried.

how beautiful a brother-love can be. they have nothing but each other

sayu hati aku siot. serious aku menangis nengok gambar ni.

UNTITLED...ladybag

2011-09-07T01:16:00.001-07:00

i am the proud owner of such beauty
and its reblogged by rbags.tumblr

hohohohohoo

*bangga*

UNTITLED....bagi makan

2011-09-03T23:12:00.000-07:00

"baby, i want to munch something sweet"
"i can fix u something"
"erm...i'm hungry"
"let me do u nutella, ok?"

its 2am in the morning and he's fixing me a chocolate sandwich

freaking shit i'm madly in love with him

=D

UNTITLED...updates?

2011-09-02T03:44:00.000-07:00

Harlo.
sorry, i havent really updated this blog for quite a while:
weird how it feels when people ask how've u been,
and they just say that because i havent updated my blog
well,
here goes:

1.i got into a very nasty rashes, a very bad skin condition, that had me rush to the hospital. the specialist wanted to detain me in the ward, but knowing that raya was just in 4 more days, she really advise me me to be a 'princess'.

2. thus, i cannot touch dirt or leaves. I cannot eat seafood,chicken and possible, no meat.

3. i'm on steroids, so my body is really plum.

4. because of my medication, i tend to sleep a lot. sorry if i havent return your calls or msg you guys. or i dont hang out much. my condition doesnt permits me.

5. after 9 years, we finally went back to Kota Bahru to raya with tokma.

6. nenek came also. we cant leave her alone in selangor to raya rite?

7. raya was beautiful. simple but nice. nothing big. we visit my late dad's grave, but i couldnt come near, yup, because of my condition and red flag.

8. i finally got to meet my cousin after, i think 12 years of not seeing him.

9. came home and lepak with my hubby all nite.

10. i miss him =D

UNTITLED...advise baik punya

2011-08-03T21:39:00.000-07:00

babe,
serious babe.

aku rase ko ada penyakit hati

?

sebab keja ko asyik complain je
asyik komen negative orang je
aku baca blog ko,
sadis aku nengok
serabut plak tu
yg aku tergelak sinis tu,
ko suka komen orang, tapi perangai ko pun dua kali lima

kesian aku nengok ko

babe,
baik ko let go apa yg ko pendam
sebab these things makes u bitter

forgive people, let it go, find a new hobby, get a new dog, or do something.

you sound sooo bitter

and what hurts me the most, being your friend, is that every word you write, portrays you, as a sad and lonely person.

kecian kan?

have time for yourself.

*i know how it feels to be bitter, worn-out, sad, lonely, lost-but i know how to pick myself up*

go, explore the world.
have spiritual connections.
it will help.

trust me, i know.

p/s: oh ya, dont forget to smile while doing it. the rest will eventually follow.

UNTITLED...kalau aku ada duit extra

2011-08-02T21:35:00.000-07:00

if i have the extra money

but i dont =(

*tolak meja mengamuk*

UNTITLED....i think you're cute

2011-07-21T08:47:00.001-07:00

*she said no more*

UNTITLED....how 4th of July started

2011-07-21T04:34:00.000-07:00

my fren read this and she was interested to get to know him

and me,being me, i try my fren to ngam-ho kan him with her lo

mana tahu my mission being miss posto back fired on me

and now i'm burning

but i dont mind though

*feels awesome*

UNTITLED...take the throne

2011-07-14T21:21:00.000-07:00

partner, let me upgrade you

meow......

?

UNTITLED....kabare

2011-07-13T02:22:00.000-07:00

updates:
1.find girls with short hair are freaking hot
2.added up a new scent to my favourites...its call 'bau kucing'
3.am not going to incubus, but looking forward to welcome a good fren back to KL
4.thinks that its time i should slim down.
5.have make an oath to wear ballerinas,flats and flip-flops...only in certain cases to wear heels....but likely would not still.
6.had her oatmeal chocolate drink for breakfast yesterday....wow...
7.love shuffling?
8.2-days-old beard are the 'in' thing now
9.somehow the 'cakap baku bahasa melayu' switch have flip on...i'm going full speed

10.feels that everyone are being fooled, stupidly into the Bersih thing

why? open your eyes....you guys are so misguided and misdirected.

Malaysia is facing a money scam, whereby there are millions of RM5 floating around without the record of Bank Negara...thats freaking serious, freaking serious, i tell you

and yet, otak cetek korang tahu nak gaduh, tak puas hati, marah-marah, melulu tak tentu pasal, bangang konon nak berjuang

SEBELUM KAMU BERTANYA APA NEGARA SUDAH BERJASA PADA KAMU, KAMU KENA TANYA DIRI SENDIRI, APA YANG KAMU LAKUKAN UNTUK NEGARA

bukak la mata babe....aku yang sengal ni pun tahu fikir

sekian, aku tepuk tangan nengok kawan-kawan gaduh sesama sendiri....yang cipta rusuhan dan skandal, duduk tepi minum teh

*tepuk dahi*

p/s: aku tak puas hati sebab aku tak dapat g pavillion masa rusuhan berlaku...tu aje -.-"

UNTITLED....some kind of secret i need to share with you

2011-07-08T13:17:00.000-07:00

you are so freaking cute when u sang this song

i actually cant believe u sang this song

you know how yummy u are when u do that

i dont freaking think you know how yummy you are when u sang

u are as cute as hell

and i have the biggest crush on you

i am your freaking number on fan, Mr Meow!

yum yum yummyyyyyy

UNTITLED....wow.....

2011-07-05T18:06:00.000-07:00

WOW

WOHOOOO

DANG

WOW

*guling*

the upmost feeling ever....
wonder why?

<3

UNTITLED.....hi, my name is aisyah

2011-07-04T02:06:00.000-07:00

harlo...

me heart cats
me love bunnies
me like ellies

as u know when its cold, my nose is turns into ice
and u noticed that when i eat, i tend to use a lot of tissue

i told you that i like little Japanese kids, they are so adorable and cute wen they talk.
and when i talked, i use strange, traditional Malay words that might sound too literature at times.

i cant resists dessert
and i love to munch a lot

i tend to be blur
but at times i talk a lot

my ideal holiday is the beach
but during my off day, i stay in bed

i have nightmares at nite, and worst if i watch zombie movies, i woke up sweating.
i think weirdly at times, and best when i'm feeling happy, i see candies flying around.

harlo
my name is aisyah
but u already know that, rite? =)

UNTITLED....hanya memuji

2011-06-21T03:21:00.001-07:00

"bontot ko lawa la babe...."

-.-

ayat hebat dari kawan pompuan aku

sekian.
*kembang bontot*

UNTITLED...welcome to antu's yummy muffin club

2011-06-20T23:53:00.001-07:00

can any men get yummier than this

*drools*

UNTITLED....lelaki yg buat lutut aku lemah

2011-06-17T01:58:00.000-07:00

owhhhhhhhhhhhhh...still my yummy muffin
nobody can take my dream away

ohhhh
yum yum yummy

UNTITLED...diam, masih tak berbicara

2011-06-15T21:02:00.000-07:00

tangan gapai, kaki tak sampai,
terbang sayap,
kaki masih beratai.

dalam keadaan redha, sujud aku, menerima,
kalau aku ditakdirkan sendiri,
ini terbaik buat kita berdua.

i have to apologies.
ya, masih ada sedikit perasaan terhadap kamu
aku bohong kalau kata tak da lansung
pernah satu ketika, aku cinta kamu penuh,
tapi tu dulu,
sekarang, mungkin tinggal di satu sudut jauh

harap faham kenapa kita tak bersama
keputusan masing-masing, kita berdua perlu gembira

pada malam, disalurkan rindu,
pada siang, mulut dikunci bisu.

UNTITLED...rasa sunyi

2011-06-14T04:32:00.001-07:00

ya
mmg aku ngaku aku agak rasa sunyi

serious dowh, sunyi giler

tapi apa yang membuat aku rasa ok
buat aku tabah hadapi

bila aku pikirkan kalau aku didalam 'tu'
aku sendiri
tak da org pun nak tolong

so might as well aku kena sabar hadapi persaan sunyi ni

korang tak pernah rase ke
bila korang nak tido malam
korang takut tak bangun esok nya

aku banyak kali rasa
dari kecik,
sampai la ni
kekadang aku takut
takut dan menangis

mampukah aku menghadap my Maker

sebab tu bila aku rasa sunyi
at least aku tahu
dalam hati aku ada Satu

ya, aku jahat
aku melakukan kemungkaran di dunia
tapi Syukur
aku masih ada rasa rendah diri
rasa takut
bahwa dunia ni sementara

aku lepak makan ngan sorang mamat ni.....dia dok sibuk cakap pasal harta benda dia, mana tempat dia dah melancong.....gila bapak kaya la jugak

tapi hati aku tak tertarik
aku tak rasa megah, atau teruja nak berkenalan ngan mamat tu
serious dowh
kalau kawin ngan dia,hidup ko dok umah, gi shopping, jaga anak
mana-mana pompuan aku rasa syok, sanggup la gedik-gedik ngan dia

tapi aku buat bodoh
muka aku bedek je

dia siap cita pantai mana dia lepak
barbados, jamaica, hawaii

'so, u kan nak melancong? pegi pantai kan? u dah survey pantai mana u nak g?'

'dah...'aku jawab

'u nak pegi mana...?'

'i tak de lah byk duit nak g melancong. skang ni pun tgh kumpul...'

'tak pe lah....u nak pegi mana...'

'i mmg g pantai...tapi ada satu tempat, i nak g...tgh kumpul duit...Insyallah...i pegi...'

'ooo really....kat mana tu? filipines ke?'

'errmmm...tak pa lah...adalah satu tempat tu...'

'its ok u can tell....'

'i nak gi umrah...'

'......'

'kalau duit banyak skit...i terus nak buat haji...Insyallah....'

aku cakap ngan ko...muka mamat tu gila klasik
klasik ternganga aku bilang

dont judge a book by its cover
itu pesan nenek aku

sekian
harap aku tabah rasa sunyi ini
sebab kalau aku ditakdirkan hidup sendiri pun,
aku tak 'sendiri'
aku punya hati pada Satu

UNTITLED...you texted

2011-06-09T04:36:00.001-07:00

you texted this morning

"...what brings you happiness, might also brings you sadness...."-aisyah M

thank you for understanding

UNTITLED......another random thing in writing

2011-06-07T03:48:00.000-07:00

1.coffee:
i have broken my promise
i am now starting back my coffee
everyday
a flat white,
with 2 tablespoon of brown sugar
y?
cos first, i found a new,affordable cafe. second, it will stopped me from munching (seriously)

2.dating
i was lepaking with my bestie last sunday
and
even my bestie asked the question 'who am i dating, who is the guy'
again.....may i point out, i am not dating anybody at the moment.
there is no MR Aisyah with me,
aight?

3.big,big,biggy
me mom came and visit us yesterday
and she was freaking out to see how 'big' i 'grew'
if i say i am getting bigger
most of my friend will say 'you're so vain aisyah, you're not big, u're ok...'
then i stated all...
my weight is now 60kg
my waist is 34 inch
unfortunately i cant even fit into my 34" jeans
so shut-up....when i say i'm big...yes, i'm big ok.fullstop.

4.helmet
i am wearing a helmet to go to work these past 2 weeks
my car is still at the workshop

5.haircut
i wanna bela rambut panjang,
but thinking how much maintenance it will cost,
i'm thinking of chop-chop-chop,again
what stopping me is the thought of my love ones asking me to not have anymore short hair
if i chop this off again, i am pretty sure people will mistaken me for 'a pretty lil boy' -.-"

6.holiday
have surveyed my way through to have a beach holiday
alone. fullstop.

7.bucketlist
i cant do surfing this month as my work schedule doesnt permits me to have any weekends,
so i have set the next bucketlist.
Insyallah, the project starts early next month, and will end 2 weeks after.

8.Mukhtafi
I fell in love with this name.
its a name of a late sultan terengganu, and there's a mosque under this name.
when i heard the name, instantly i feel in love with it.
If my future husband permits (whoever that is) i hope to give my son this name.

9.Music
Time doesnt permits me to continue.
serious...i wish i have more time.

10.love my job, love my life, love my family, love my friends.
but its not complete.
i need you in my life
you, yes you...
ask me on a date, i'm waiting
waiting,patiently.

till then, adios....

UNTITLED....i needz a blue-skyz holidayz

2011-06-06T03:28:00.000-07:00

seriously....

serious, seriously

*dying*

UNTITLED...finally

2011-06-03T05:53:00.000-07:00

yup, finally i updated my other blog

http://randomly0antu.blogspot.com/2011/06/now-out-of-sheer-randomness-antu-would.html

yup,
finally.

"aisyah, serious....ko tulis la lagi babe blog...lame tak baca dowh"

terkejut gak aku sapa yg baca blog aku

org yg aku tak kenal, siap msg aku nye inbox mintak post

wow....thank you. appriciated your support

=D

UNTITLED....i become part of your past

2011-06-03T04:42:00.001-07:00

cable car

it was effortless

UNTITLED....ayat baik punya

2011-05-21T01:57:00.000-07:00

ayat pick-up baik punya
ayat pick-up yg aku tahu dia tak sengajakan
dan dia ikhlas
somehow i knew

well, wat ever it is
me liky
me very liky indeed

he makes me feel 'nice'

*blushed*

UNTITLED....campak masuk laut

2011-05-16T23:05:00.000-07:00

aku tak abis-abis senyum wei
pelik

kalau korang negok muka aku skang
aku rasa korang nak sepak je
nyampah
dah macam kerang busuk
duk sorang2 pun tersenyum

bangang ke apa aisyah ni
ke hang dah gila
ke mabuk

hahahahah

-_-"

aku sendiri pun takut ngan diri aku
boleh plak tersenyum sorang2

kembang buntut,
masuk guni,
campak dalam laut

he he he he

sah aku mabuk laut
baik punya

-_-"

UNTITLED....thats it

2011-05-14T09:28:00.000-07:00

thats it
i'll just f*cking gonna say it

i am freaking in love with a man who,i think,doesnt even know that i like him

why?

sebab i act so stupid in front of him

argghhh...for the longest freaking time
only few men have made me gelabah in front of them

and this guy never failed to do

*gelabah*

have you ever been stared by a man, who just looked at you,
and you ask him
'is there something wrong with me?'
'no..'
you started to touch your face to make sure there's no mayonnaise on it,
or glide your toungue across your teeth to make sure there's nothing stuck among it
or use your fingers to comb your hair to make sure it doesnt fall out of place
and then you ask him back
'is there something wrong with me?'
'no...'he just answered back

then freaking stop starring at me
i'm in love with your eyes

i wanted to say that to him
but of course i didnt
instead i said

please stop starring at me, its rude okaayyyyy *rolling my eyes*

arghhh stupid aisyah
she's trippin cos a guy just makes her nervous

*slap*

dear mr,
i like you very much

huhuhuhu...
i have to thank my fren whom introduced me to him

dear fren
at 1st i wanted to just kill you
but now, i just want to thank you
seriously, just thank you

thanks babe
guwe ingat jasa lo

*tunduk hormat*

=D

UNTITLED....as much as i want to

2011-05-14T06:07:00.000-07:00

as much as i want too
the only way i get to know u is by seeing you more often

yup
and i wish for every second

-______-

aisyah tgh gelabah

mmg gelabah

hahahahhaha.....

UNTITLED.....facts for fakta

2011-05-11T08:27:00.000-07:00

fakta yang mungkin kamu tidak tahu pasal saya:

1.jeans
saya sudah lame tak pakai jeans. paling last pakai masa gi penang dua bulan setengah lalu. kenapa? sebab bontot aku besar. serious, tak tipu. bila beli jeans, pinggang saya kecik, tapi bab peha ngan bontot mmg fail -__-" so, solution dia, saya selalu pakai long skirt, jumpsuit, aladins, seluar kembang, dan benda2 sewaktu dgnnya.kalau buang tbiat gak nak pakai jean, serious, mengambil masa 30 minit untuk put them jeans on.

2.nescafe
ya, saya kuat minum kopi satu ketika dolu, tapi skang dah kurang. saya tak boleh minum nescafe, sebab nanti saya terkentut-kentut. Sumpah tak tipu. saya kena minum kopi mahal (ayat nak kena penampar)

3.kebaya
saya suka kebaya.ini fakta saya rase semua rakyat jelata dah tahu. tapi saya nak bgtau gak. ya, saya suka kebaya.

4.bau
saya suka bau org. tak tipu, saya suka bau-bauan. tapi kalau terkena bau pekasam, mati migrain kapla den.

5. toolbox & wayar jumpstart
keta saya tak da aksesori menarik. cuma ada toolbox yg lengkap dan wayar jumpstart. ia membuat kwn lelaki saya kagum dan musykil terhadap kewanitaan saya -__-

6.botak
sebenarnya, saya suka lelaki botak. tetambah lagi kalau muka mamat tu cam budak nakal, tapi baik hati. wahhhhh...sungguh tertawan hati ini *melelehhhhh*

7.kambing biri-biri
saya suka makan kambing biri-biri. Lamb-Lamb-Glorious Lamb
bhaaaaa...bhaaaaa...bhaaaa <---zombie lamb

8.cinta
ada setengah budak anggap saya ni player. sebab patah tumbuh, hilang berganti katanya. kalau korang jumpa setengah budak tu, cakap ngan dia, aisyah nak jumpa. biar aku kasi pelempang laju2. mana fakta ntah dia ambik cakap aku player.
bagi saya cinta tak boleh dibuat main-main. perlu jujur dan niat satu. sebab saya memilih tu lah kot yg menyebabkan saya mengenali ramai lelaki. but serious, aku bukan bercinta penuh, cuma lepak-lepak berkawan. kalau nak kata betul-betul sapa boyfren saya, mereka yg rapat (besties), diarang tahu. aku kalau dah sayang cintan cintun, serious, aku mmg menjadi org yg serious didlm cinta. ewahhh...

9. orang tua
cukup pantang nenek moyang aku kalau org muda tak hormat org tua.

10. bahasa
penggunaan bahasa saya adalah janggal dan klasik. contoh di bawah:
-kalau org cakap pompuan, saya bilang wanita
-kalau org cakap opis, saya bilang pejabat
-kalau org cakap menarik, saya bilang karisma
-kalau org cakap jom, saya bilang mari
yg ni bab tak leh nak tolong dah
kalau org cakap reverse, saya bilang gostan

-.-

selamat malam dunia!

Untitled....baby let me upgrade you

2011-05-11T05:19:00.000-07:00

you need a real women in your life

you need a queen to your kingdom

just let me upgrade you

he he he he

UNTITLED....cute giler tahap gaban

2011-05-08T08:48:00.000-07:00

gaban pun tak cute macam ni

ayuh kita bernyanyi bersama =D

UNTITLED....mama

2011-05-07T11:07:00.000-07:00

kepada anak muda yg cetek pemikirannya

Sesungguhnya kamu semua berbicara
bahwa sa nya kamu sayang ibu kamu
wanita yang telah melahirkan kamu
meletakkan dia di atas kamu,
kamu sayang dia, dan kamu bangga dan berbicara kepada semua
bahawa ibu kamu, sungguh kamu sayang dan cinta

tapi bagi saya,
budak hingusan seperti kamu adalah hipokrit
penipu besar
penikam belakang
penconteng arang

kenapa?

terdetikkah kamu
bila kamu berbuat sesuatu yang dilarang oleh ibu kamu
kamu berbicara bohong kepadanya
kamu sanggup menipu demi menutup salah kamu dihadapannya
kamu tipu dia,
dengan berlagak baik,
berniat hati, konon tidak mahu melukakannya
wal hal banyak perkara mungkar kamu telah lakukan

kamu sanggup tipu dan berlagak baik depan ibu kamu

bagi aku,
kamu anak derhaka

jangan tikam ibu kita
sungguh kita sayang dia,
perlu lurus niat dihati,
kena ikhlas pertalian nadi

walau sungguh kita tak serapat mana dengan ibu kita
tolong jgn tikam belakang dia,
sayang dia dengan sepenuh hati, seperti bicara

ingat, ibu adalah segala, bapa adalah ketua.

Selamat Hari Ibu.

UNTITLED....first session

2011-05-03T10:42:00.000-07:00

what i got to know about him:
1.he is in love with creed
2.he plays the electric guitar
3.he is a heavy smoker
4.he doesnt eat durian
5.he drinks nescafe o
6.he is the 1st child
7.he love football n futsal
8.he doesnt eat hati ayam
9.he loves ulam jantung
10.he is 168cm tall

the 1st question that pops from his mouth just now was

'so...how come you know dream theater...?'

we talk about food, to justin bieber

we never meet before

dun even know how each other looks like except in mms

he's not active with the net, not even fb

but some how it clicks

it just clicks

*click*

yup

it just clicks

=D

i was walking down the road, looking up, smilling, and talking...as if I was talking to God.

Syukur, i can feel a beat again

*click*

UNTITLED....you look nice

2011-04-28T10:21:00.000-07:00

saw your new profile

u look nice

p/s: finally you change your profile pic to a current you.

UNTITLED....to who ever's out there

2011-04-23T12:42:00.000-07:00

aku cair nengok lelaki pakai baju melayu cekak musang

kacak siot

*meleleh*

=P

UNTITLED....once upon a time

2011-04-23T02:11:00.000-07:00

lovesong-adele

UNTITLED.... =O

2011-04-22T09:22:00.000-07:00

i am really surprise at who reads my blog

seriously

really,
really,
really,

S.U.R.P.R.I.S.E

=O

thank you

for taking the time to just read my nonsense
i appreciate it

=)

you rawks.....

UNTITLED.....happy?

2011-04-21T04:36:00.000-07:00

=D

happy?
most definately

*heart just jump with joy*

UNTITLED....i dreamt i was a ballerina

2011-04-20T10:46:00.000-07:00

i was walking down the alley

then
i saw 4 men standing outside the entrance
stating that there's a dance competition
and they would like me to join in

they pulled my hand
i walked inside

it was a big hall
there was a big staircase going up towards the next level

in the middle of the staircase
stood a tall, poise, late 40's man
i knew he was the judge
and the 4 men says that i had to impress him

we had to impress him

i told them that i didnt know how to dance
a guy said its ok

'its in your blood...'

i sat down at the end of the staircase
and watched them dance

each of them took their turn

they were doing a contemporary dance

at the end

the same guy took my hand and ask me to dance

i just shake my head
indicating i do not know anything about dancing

he took my hand
pulled me up
lead me to the middle of the dance floor

i stood there looking at them
looking at me

suddenly
out of no where
i just race myself to the nearest wall
lift my left feet against it
and started my dance piece from there

all i can remember was

the moment
where i was in the middle of the hall
and i started spinning
slowly
round-and-round
it grew faster
and faster
i felt it in my toes
my body just felt the rush
i even could hear the loud classical song played in my head
as if the radio was just beside my ear
i felt it
it was just like i'm alive
i can feel the gravity

i was just spinning
and spinning
i didnt want to stop

then suddenly
i felt warm arms around my waist

it was a guy
among the 4
whom slowed me down
and said
'you were wonderful'
'you did well'
and he smiled

i remember how he looked
his eyes
his face
i didnt know this guy
and yet
i know him in my dreams

he just smiled
and i woke up

i woke up in the nick of time
in the nick of time to go to work

strangely
this time when i woke up

i could remember the dream
i could remember the tune
i could remember the feeling of spinning
i could remember his face

i just sat there at the end of my bedsheets

just thinking how weird the dream was

as far as weird my dreams could be

this was the weirdest so far

and yet,
it was the most beautiful among all

weird,
very weird i must say

*sometimes i dream of black cats, rivers, beach, jungle, houses, alley and many more*

yes, i am weird. my late dad says its a gift. a gift of imagination.
but sometimes i dream of bad things
nightmares
of zombies and ghost

when i was lil, my late dad used to say it's ok, everything will be alright
this is if i were to wake up form a bad dream
crying
and asking for a hug

i thought that if i grew up
none of these dreams would chase me again

it seems i was wrong

i do get nightmares sometimes

and sometimes
sweet ones too

its 2.21 in the morning.....why am i still up?

*sweet dreams are made of these, who am i to disagree*

UNTITLED....something i felt deep inside, still

2011-04-19T08:15:00.000-07:00

comsumed with what to transpire

UNTITLED...if i were a singer

2011-04-19T05:34:00.000-07:00

most definately i wanna be like lauryn hill, sade, chaka khan, duffy, amy winehouse

and all other soul sister of all

but most definately

i would kill just to be yummy'lious like her

most definately

*yummy*

UNTITLED....name saye gemuk

2011-04-18T10:09:00.000-07:00

ada saya heran?

=D

UNTITLED....close my eyes

2011-04-15T11:06:00.000-07:00

Close my eyes
Let the whole thing pass me by
There is no time to waste
Asking why?
I'll run away with you, by my side
I'll run away with you, by my side
I need to let go, let go, let go, let go of this pride
(Asking why?)

I think about your face
And how I fall into your eyes
The out moment I trace around the one that I call mine
Time to count more space
And beware that your drew the line
I don't need you solve this case
And I don't need to look behind

Close my eyes
Let the whole thing pass me by
There is no time to waste
Asking why?
I'll run away with you, By my side
I'll run away with you, By my side
I need to let go, let go, let go, let go of this pride
(Asking why?)

Do I except you change, the past I hold inside?
With all the words I say
Repeating over in my mind
Some things you cant erase
No matter how hard you try
An exit to escape
Is all there is left to find

Close my eyes
Let the whole thing pass me by
There is no time to waste
Asking why?(Asking why)
I'll run away with you, by my side
I'll run away with you, by my side
I need to let go, let go, let go, let go of this pride
Until this echo, echo, echo, echo in my mind
Until this echo, echo, echo, echo can subside

So I,
Close my eyes
Let the whole thing pass me by
There is no time to waste
Asking why?
I'll run away with you, by my side
I'll run away with you, by my side
I need to let go, let go, let go, let go of this pride
Until this echo, echo, echo, echo in my mind
Until this echo, echo, echo, echo can subside

UNTITLED....i am just too greatful

2011-04-14T10:13:00.000-07:00

as i cry on certain days,
when things doesnt go my way

but lately i have been blessed
with a beautiful family
wonderful friends
a good job

dear God,
I am truly blessed
I am thankful for Your countless gift

to have bread on my table
to have a roof over my head
to have love companions around me

i kept thinking today, as once upon a time i used to sleep inside the car, i had nothing
and now, i believe, i belong to something
and that something is call 'home'

thank you, oh God

for that i am always a devotee to You

Amin...=)

UNTITLED....lily's boyfriend

2011-04-14T09:37:00.000-07:00

caleb is just too hott

yummy

caleb yummy muffin

ahaks=)

UNTITLED...cikgu aisyah

2011-04-13T04:22:00.000-07:00

aisyah: kamu pergi makan mana?

weng: nasi campuk *tangan tunjuk depan*

aisyah: nasi campur kat depan

weng: a-ah, kat plaza moint kiala

aisyah: oh, medan selera la tu

weng: bukan lah, food courk

aisyah: itu la medan selera

weng: apa itu medan selera...food courk lah

aisyah: ayooooo...itu food court panggil medan selera lah

weng: ya ka?

aisyah: abis, kalau bahasa melayu, food court tu apa

weng: food courk lah. kamu olang melayu selalu cakap itu food courk

-.-

weng adalah seorang rakan pejabat saya yang selalu bertutur bahasa kerana dia bilang yang bahasa inggeris dia pun lingkup...so dia selalu bertutur bahasa melayu dengan saya.

Kalau dengar, mmg kelakar...boleh buat gaduh

yang aku pulak...tak abis-abis kena gelak ngan geng pejabat/kawan aku....diorang kata aku nye bahasa dan percakapan kekadang baku. -_-"

nak buat cam mana
dah nasib badan

hohohohoh =D

UNTITLED....yup, be bold

2011-04-12T05:32:00.000-07:00

its not how you carry yourself infront of a person
its how you be true to yourself to the person

UNTITLED....bahan bualan

2011-04-11T08:25:00.000-07:00

aku perlu tukar punggunaan perkataan dalam ayat aku

moga=mintak-mintaklah

ayat aku: moga dia ingat
ayat kalau tak nak kena bahan: mintak-mitaklah dia ingat

rekaan=design

ayat aku: aku suka rekaan terbaru coach
ayat kalau tak nak kena bahan: aku suka design terbaru coach

fikir=ingat

ayat aku: aku fikir nak gantikan je
ayat kalau tak nak kena bahan: aku ingat nak gantikan je

kacak=handsome

ayat aku: kacak uu mamat tu
ayat kalau tak nak kena bahan: handsome uu mamat tu

susah betul nak guna bahasa pasar ni -_-"

banyak kali plak tu aku kena bahan

aku ingat ada satu ketika dulu
aku tgh dating ngan sorang mamat ni
masa tu, kitarang tgh makan
aku tegur dia 'b, u got something on your dagu'
dia balas 'whats a dagu?' sambil pegang dahi dia, ingat dagu tu dahi

-_-"

mmg la aku tak guna bahasa sangat, skang baru nak praktis

watodo...hohohoho

UNTITLED....dear mr stalker

2011-04-11T07:50:00.000-07:00

i know you'll be reading this,

and yes, there's no turning back

good bye

this is it

adele-rolling in deep

"we could have it all"
i guess

UNTITLED....oh ya, i forgot

2011-04-11T04:37:00.001-07:00

i just heard
or actually read it

ouch?

it hurts doesnt it

well,
what goes around comes around

hell freaking yeah
full of awesomeness

karma rawks

=D

(p/s: ya, aku adalah manusia bangang yg suka bila nengok org lain sedih...tapi kalau org tersebut yg penyebab duka lara satu ketika dulu...aku tak kisah aku dipanggil manusia bangang...sebab serious, guwe puas lo sakit)

UNTITLED....alo, nama saya aisyah

2011-04-11T04:31:00.000-07:00

nama saya aisyah

ye ke?

pembetulan

nama saya Siti Aisyah bt. Mohd. Mokhtar

dan saya bangga dengan nama ini

=D

UNTITLED....bila aku berbicara

2011-04-07T23:33:00.001-07:00

cerna
pejabat
tempah
nada dering
klasik
ibunda
ayuh
suatu ketika
bahwa
tepak
maka
begitu
marilah
motif
ulasan
wawancara
ceria
akan tetap
seperti biasa
berubah
arah
kami
mengapa

dan sebagainya

ya, saya masih guna perkataan di atas

lepas tu kena gelak besar
-_-"
macam cipan

hahahahha...no hal la
watodo

aku mmg org klasik
bila berbicara
mungkin tak tahu nak cakap apa

=P

its who i am, not who i wanna be

UNTITLED......updates yaw

2011-04-07T04:09:00.000-07:00

1. dengan segala hormatnya diumumkan bahwa saya dah turun 3 kg. skang berat saya 55kg. Yay?

2. Minum kopi kurang, tapi masih minum lagi

3. ya, saya single...ada masalah?

4. jatuh cinta ngan seorang mamat yg mungkin lansung tak terlintas kat hati dia yang aku suka kat dia. sebab gaya aku mmg cam bangang dan suka buat muka bodoh.haih...

5. 2 orang kawan aku nak kawen 1 mei ni. pagi pompuan, malam lelaki. hebat!

6. aku suka tgk gambar zaman aku memuda dulu, membuatkan aku nak bela rambut panjang balik.

7. tgh pikirkan bucket list aku seterusnya. Insyallah bulan June ni tercapai.

8. bontot aku makin besar, sebab tu aku banyak pakai long skirts, jump-suits and seluar kembang.

9. Aku terfikir dah lama aku tak balik kampung. harap aku dapat main hujan lagi

10. skang aku dah tak kisah apa orang nak pikir pasal aku. sebab true frens lies within. love yourself 1st, and the rest will follow.

Ayuh! mari berceria,
jangan senang duka,
hati mesti bersua,
moga riang tiada terluka.

ewahhhhh...spontan babe-_-"

UNTITLED....free falling

2011-04-06T08:59:00.000-07:00

man it feels awesome

p/s: today was an awesome day

why?

clue: crush

he's my biggest crush

the biggest, so far

*smiles*

i'm freaking happyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, on top of the world

i hope he doesnt read this,
cos if he do,
he knows i'm he's biggest fan

i feel like a high-school kid

huhuhuhu

*grin*

UNTITLED....masa untuk kurus balik

2011-04-05T10:11:00.000-07:00

f*ck

so damn obvious ke yg aku dah put on weight

f*ck

i should pipe it down abit

but how can i?

food is like glorioussssssssssss to me

=(

*sings* food,food glorious food

UNTITLED....pity u

2011-04-04T10:44:00.000-07:00

aku dah tengok muka awek tu
stakat tu je yg ko mampu
padan la sangat

serious
aku bersyukur i left ur ass back then

anyhow
good luck
all the best
and God bless

cos u need all the luck in the world
and for her
she need all the luck in the universe

what?
me being cruel?
i jahat?
sangatttt
if to u, yes i'll be the pain in ur ass
and i will rain on your parade
wait till she see's ur true color

scumbag

*grin*

UNTITLED....i've made up my mind

2011-04-03T04:25:00.000-07:00

another bucket list will be slash out
aint gonna tell you until i've done it

hehehehe <-ketawa jahat

clue
-90% paddling, 10% ?

awesomeeeeeeeeeeee.....

11th June...here i comeeeeeeeeee

UNTITLED...giler jeles

2011-03-30T06:42:00.000-07:00

gila tahap cipan aku jeles ngan lily
cipan pun tak jeles macam aku

serious....

-.-

oh caleb ku, dimanakah kamuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

UNTITLED....pukul empat dua puluh empat pagi

2011-03-28T13:24:00.001-07:00

ya,
saya belum tidur

kenapa ya?

ini untuk malam-malam yg panjang,
mata tak lelap, hingga ke siang.

*wonders*

UNTITLED....amy, my amy

2011-03-26T00:12:00.000-07:00

i think she's brilliant
and beautiful

who care's what u think?

i stick with mine

what?

yup, i thought so too

she's brilliant
and beautiful

UNTITLED....sebelum semua kahwin

2011-03-21T23:28:00.000-07:00

*not to forget, lovely Ann, who's not in this picture*

its hard to find a group of frens who stayed together
i've meet them when i was 13
and i left the school at 14

one evening
a school reunion brought us back together again
i have to thank dipie for forcing me to go to the reunion
back in 1998 (if i'm not mistaken)

cos if she didnt do so

i wouldnt be in this family

i love my soul sisters

class bakti rawks!

=D

UNTITLED....apa aku rasa

2011-03-21T06:39:00.000-07:00

untuk golongan yang ada cinta
tapi tidak mampu memupuk perasaan itu
atas sebab-sebab tertentu

ya

aku golongan itu

UNTITLED...so what

2011-03-20T04:12:00.000-07:00

a blue turkish antique bracelet
with metal & wooden bangles
around my wrist

a hand made copper-wired red-blue-brown-stones ring
around my finger

a red round shape plastic earing
on my ears

a navy blue&white suspenders
with a high-rise stretchable wash-out black jeans
for my belly below

a 501st normal round-neck t-shirt
for my top

a brown hat
with black and white stripes around it
and my hair tuck in

a black pvc hobo hangbag
with adjustable metal/pvc strap
to carry my miggits around

a black pointed
ballet-like, flat shoes
to suit my walking needs

would you dare to wear something like this?

u wont right?

well i will =P

and i rock with it

f*ck off if you dont like my hat, skirts, patterns, clutches, shoes, rings or anything

i choose what i wear

aint no harm if 1 outta 10 were to fall out from 'fashion normal'

havent you heard?

we are who we are

and i love it!

*grind*

UNTITLED....feeling lonely

2011-03-18T04:42:00.000-07:00

today
again,
i have to see the doctors
and this time
i was alone

before this
its with my sis didi
or my bestie fatimah
or my soul sister mawar

but today i was alone

many people text me
call me
asking how is it
i love u guys
serious
nothing beats good frens

i was a bit
kinda ok
blur
buat bodo
of the feeling being alone

i like companions around me
would make me feel 'alive'
not sick
or painful
as painful of my ear

as i parked my car
walked
looking around trying to find the clinic
asked the info counter
took my number
waited
and just looked around

i looked around
i saw people who wasnt feeling very well
i looked around
they were with their love ones

i suck it in
just ignored the feeling inside

open the sun newspaper
second page

i started crying

no shit
my eyes started raining

my ear pain came back?
no
i feel lonely?
no

i started crying becos i saw a picture

a picture of an old man
in the ruins of tsunami in Japan
with a picture on his back

a picture of his lost wife
strap around his back
trying to find her
walking about with the ruins

My God
did i cry

he loved his wife very much, i must say
never gave up
and always pray

My god
I just cried

and becos of that
it inspired me to write a poem

http://antu-art-motion.tumblr.com/

and God
did i cried
dated 18th march

UNTITLED....damn it

2011-03-14T14:50:00.000-07:00

after all these f*ckin years
i'll take deep breath looking at certain pictures
memories still keep bugging me

i wonder why

f*ck

UNTITLED.....dah lama juga

2011-03-13T08:55:00.000-07:00

mari,mari
kita berlari
lari jauh
mengikut hati

pada bulan di lontarkan batu
pada hati salurkan rindu
aku berkira hari demi hari
satu saat rasa terhenti

tiap saat aku terfikir
akan kewarasan minda, hati dan diri
benar sungguh aku rasa kaku
pada rasa yang buat ku membunuh
sayang aku pada tanah
kepakku mahu terbang, kaki ku bernanah

tebar aku segulung tikar
sujud aku niat beikrar
sungguh aku malu meminta
moga hati tenang, selesa dijiwa

ini untuk malam-malam tidur ku tak penuh
bangun mimpiku masih mengeluh
dalam hatiku cinta tak jenuh

UNTITLED....are u in Japan?

2011-03-11T04:56:00.001-08:00

i got 8 misscalls
one of it was a foreign number
please dont tell me u're in Japan

God, I couldnt stop thinking the worst
please call me, txt me, fb me, or something

i cant call ur mom
sure she'll go nuts about me, or u, or us (we're just friends k)
i takut she thinks else and she'll be happy for a while, then when i say its nothing, she'll be sad again
my God,
i'm babling
pleaseeeeeeeeee
tell me u're not in Japan
God, tell me u're not in Japan

time aku tak bawak phone, time tu la benda cam ni nak jadi

i have the worst sick feeling in my stomach
ok
please
be safe
no matter where u are

GODDDD, just call me back k
u know how

ARGHHHHH...

P/S: this doesnt mean anything...dun get me wrong...its just me being worried about my frens, and u are my fren, so call me k.

UNTITLED....nobody knows it but me

2011-03-08T05:28:00.000-08:00

*u never fail to make me smile*

i'm alone
in the office
duffy's playing
doing my task
a bit of fb

then

ur txt came in

Mecca, 2am.

*u never fail to make me smile*

UNTITLED....it so beautiful

2011-03-07T03:06:00.000-08:00

i saw the picture
its beautiful
u must be at peace
i wish i can be there
maybe one day
its beautiful
so beautiful
u take care
jgn lupa alas perut
take rest
and God bless

=)

*i wish to write you an email, but i dunno what to write. I'm just glad you txt me*

TIDAK BERTAJUK....kalau saya bertutur dalam bahasa melayu

2011-03-06T01:09:00.001-08:00

'aku nak balik pejabat jap...'
ayat ini penyebab aku jadi bahan

'saya nak tempah, boleh?'
ayat ini pun penyebab aku jadi bahan

hanya sebab aku guna perkataan 'pejabat' dan 'tempah'
orang melayu sendiri gelakkan aku

bila aku bertanya, kenapa gelakkan aku,
mereka bilang

'mana ada orang guna perkataan tu. plus, kalau dengar, kelakar....'

huh?

'orang skang guna ofis'

'orang tak guna tempah, just say i wanna order for tomorrow'

keliru aku, sungguh keliru

masa aku kecil
aku diejek

rambut aku kerinting,
mata aku coklat
kalau orang pantas bercakap bahasa melayu dengan aku,
aku lansung tak faham
darjah dua, aku masih tak tahu eja lori

masa aku remaja
aku kena bahan
kalau tak tahu masak lemak cili api, kena cemuh dalam kelas
aku panggil kuih keria, kuih donut - makcik kantin kecoh satu sekolah aku tak tahu nama kuih

ya, aku tak tahu banyak
tapi itu bukan penyebab untuk orang melayu sendiri gelakkan orang dia

aku melayu
mungkin separuh
mungkin penuh

apa yang boleh kamu semua hakimi kalau orang itu melayu atau tidak?

dari segi bahasa?
tata tertib?
pakaian?
agama?
suara lantang?
sawa matang?
mata bulat?
rambut ikal mayang?

maaf aku terlampau marah
dari kecil, sampai hari ini
kaum aku sendiri gelakkan aku
aku tak faham

satu ketika dulu aku memakai baju kebaya hitam
nenek aku bilang
"cantiknya cucu aku pakai kebaya, betul cantik"
aku bangga
selalu aku pakai baju lain, tak pernah nenekku puji

atuk angkat aku suruh aku pakai selendang
"cucu kena pakai seledang,tahu. baru nampak ayu"

konsert pertama aku,
konsert keroncong hetty koes endang,
dibawa oleh ibu ku

aku tidak lagi memperkenalkan diriku, kepada mereka yang baru, dengan nama panggilan syasya
aku mahu mereka panggil aku aisyah
maksud aisyah ialah
orang yang hidup bahagia
aku bangga ada nama sebegitu rupa
dan ini pesan ayah aku juga

adakah kalau muka aku lebih cenderung ke arah keturunan bugis melaka aku, kamu semua tak memperlekehkan aku?

maaf
aku memang dalam keadaan marah

lebih marah
bila yang tegur dan gelakkan aku itu suka berbicara pasal isu melayu
mereka sayangkan bangsa mereka
tetapi gaya, ada masa, tidak kena

*sekali lagi, aisyah mohon maaf kalau ada yang tersinggung/marah/makan hati akan penulisan aisyah*

saya sangat sayangkan semua
keturunan, keluarga
bangsa dan agama

dan saya masih belajar
ingin belajar
paling penting, memahami

UNTITLED...there's so many things i wanted to say, but i just cant

2011-03-04T04:55:00.000-08:00

today
i had lunch with my fren
dunno how
the chatting becomes a subject about u
i didnt say much
i didnt explain much
but i put it in a nutshell the story of us
just few sentences

she had tears in her eyes

belive it or not

she had tears in her eyes listening to my story
about us
which i just briefly explain
in about 5mins
without going into details

"its so saddddddd..." she cried

i just look at her
i dunno what to react
cos i dah immune
so i just buat muka beda/selamba/bodo/dee

"things happen for a reason..." i said

yup,
most definately

things happen for a reason

if you ask me all the love story that i had
i swear to God,
nothing beats my story
every single relationship
nothing beats one another

sometimes i just wonder where did i put my heart at

*wonders*

UNTITLED....i love

2011-03-04T04:38:00.001-08:00

i love to bite baby's cheeck
i love to steal my mom's shoe
i love to dance in the rain
i love to breath in the smell of fresh cut grass
i love to sing
i love to dance
i love to smell other people's perfume
i love to roll my eyes
i love to see how muffins are being bake
i love the smell of coffee during rain

i love you

yes you, who ever reading this

you maybe a girl from jamaica
you maybe a 45year old guy reading randomly my blog

i love you

and dont forget

to love yourself too=)

love is the ultimate power

even if you're alone in the universe, like me

even if you're alone in the office, like me

just love yourself
and the universe will follow you

=)

UNTITLED....pee-ka-but

2011-03-02T20:04:00.000-08:00

hi,
its me again
miss me?
i thought so too
funny thing is that,
some of my frens txt me, asking how come i havent blog no more
wow
never expect people were to read about me
hey, its just about me
me and my daily dosage of life, love, family, frens
perspective of life
so...
wat do u wanna hear?

work?
i got into a new place in moint kiara
awesome stuff,
been happy, its been long since i like/working/passion about something that i do for money

guitar?
i put it on hold, financially not enough. i've been supporting my sis a-level and education nowadays is not cheap. but the value, is priceless. so i dont mind putting on hold what i love, who i love and care i must put them 1st

family?
been great...i miss my granma, but all she can ask around is, who's i'm dating -_-"

love?
hmmm...actually, u can categories me as single but not available. i dunno where did i put my heart. its lost somewhere. things happen for a reason.

him?
there's a malay saying "kalau jodoh ada, Insyallah" (if God's willing and its fated, it will be there). lets just say due to certain subject we cant be together, for the time being. how ever, i do believe time is running out for me.

life?
i'm quite happy. been listening to a lot of jazz. having time on my own. self discovery. having my own bucketlist and trying to achieve it.

frens?
they rock....my frens, they all rock...i love them to the max....how do i know they love me back? well, if i were to be quite, max 1 week, they would surely call to see wassup. i love them

health?
doing fine. still have a lil flame with me. last migrane was on the 20th feb. i'm 55kg still though. n somehow, i'm happy with it.

life's been beautiful...supple, but yet there's something thrilling about it
and yes, i've been reading
reading?
aisyah reads?
yes, aisyah's been reading
i miss my coffee
but the last time i had one was i cant even remember when
that shows how long i've stop on my cuppa
in the morning when i wake up, i'll take me 10mins to get up
i'll think
and have thoughts
in the car
when i drove back
i'll think
and have thoughts
it seems that i'm getting old
mature and wiser is what my surroundings are stating
no, i'm just learning
and still
learning life

i'm trying to find money
and slash one of my bucketlist
to go umrah
in 2/3 years in time
Amin
hope God's willing
and i know Allah loves me
and faith have kept me alive and always will be

=)

my life is supple...yet, thrilling

UNTITLED....I AM IN LOVEEEEEEEEE......

2011-02-22T10:01:00.000-08:00

fucking shit i am not kidding
i am seriously loving this cover and these two gifted guys

fucking shit no kidding

fuck shit

shit fuck

*aisyah tend to swear when men makes her nervous*
-___-"

i am in loveeeeeeee.......

*plays her guitar*

UNTITLED.....apa kabar org kg?

2011-01-04T00:18:00.000-08:00

4th jan 2010

dang...that long huh?

busy?

lets see

i've been busy with my work
seeing a lot of frens
have unexpected spontaneous event

go to here
went there
been all around

now?
current at UM's library
at 5pm going to play badminton with my besties
wow?
hahahahah...
nowadays i just dun plan

i even got to see the lastest movie by getting free tckts
got present for christmas
going to many,many,many cafe to eat and explore
got a gig but turn it down
went back to banting
got a new kitten,me moms new 'daughter'
become an mc at a student council

and many more

i'm still at 55kg though

and the boobs getting most of the attention

-_-"

its just boobs

stupid over rated boobs

watodo

tralalalala...

oh ya,

Happy New Year!

dang,that long huh?

=)