UNTITLED...cant say,wont tell

tonite
is a nite of silence
when communication is just a light matter to humans
n nite crawlers ruled the sound wave
bringing blues in the moonlight
words and sentences, wont come out rite

and when u're drifted away
a simple question would make ur day

just by asking

how are u today?

tell me a story
tell me to stay

"when i'm gone, whos gonna ask u the question
when u're gone, nobody gonna ask me that question"

UNTITLED...words of adVICE

dear friend,
when the one u love doesnt appreciate u
he went behind u back
tell u lies
comes to u only when he's sad

what the fuck u want me to say?

i ask u this...
when was the last time he said u're beautiful?

....
....

see...
u cant even recall the last time he said that to u

now
i say this to you

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL...

go to hell if he brings u down
i'm here, i'll stay by ur side

if he goes around looking for other women
we'll make him bow down
where's the luscious, beautiful, h.o.tt girl i once knew

its pay back time,
but of course...
we have to fight it with style
wink-wink

xoxoxo
ur gurl frennn...

UNTITLED...too busy eh?

lately...
i've been too busy...

...

antu busy eh?
weird...

cos me life
is not exactly like that

u see,
i love a quite life
the life were nobody bothers me
thus, i dun bother other people
lurv that sort of life
and manage to keep it that way

but some how
it change
evolving
into something
that i sometimes cant control
nor focus on

my life
it used to be
work, family, love and friends

now
its
work,family,love and friends

.....

weird

.....

it doesnt change eh?

but somehow

it does...

adventure is out there!!!!!!

UNTITLED...when nothing else matters

when the party's over
we would still belong to each other

underneath your cloth
there's an endless story
that's a man i choose
that's my teritory
and all the things i deserve
for being such a good girl
honey

missed u,truly

UNTITLED...legend has it

An owl came and asks me to be its friend
A gift, or a curse?
I found a baby squirrel and raise it as my own
A gift, or a curse?
I played with a snake; put my finger in its mouth
A gift, or a curse?
A royal elephant bow two times under my command
A gift, or a curse?
I notice how flower bees have conversation with each other
A gift, or a curse?
I never failed to notice white or black buttery flies flying around my present
A gift, or a curse?
I manage to make homeless dogs to followed me, but I can’t take care of them
A gift, or a curse?
Its evolving….this gift or curse

And the legend continues….

That I can fly off in the air if I wanted to
I can communicate and see what others don’t
That I can help the helpless and giving needs to the need ones
That I have the strength to fight in wars and combats

Many have called me name
Trying to define who am i
Better yet
What am i

They say I was born pure blood
They say that I’m a human child with gifts that man can only dream off

Yeah rite….

Just another walk in the park for me
Its going to be 25 years now
And I am still stuck in the maze of life

Papa, what should I do?
Once u were the guardian
And now
They ask me to take your place
How come?
I’m just a girl..
They tried taking her away
They succeed only half
Now, the others need me,
But me alone, I can’t do it
It’s hard being pure blood
Is it a Gift, or a Curse?

Dan bila mereka di jalan yang lurus
Belajar mengawal, berbicara, mengurus
Maka dengan itu, hadiah itu berkembang
Tapi bila di bentuk, di situ ada simpang
Ke kanan baik, ke kiri buruk
Di pilihnye satu, dahi berkerut
Kamu mahu jadi apa, sang manusia
Penari, Pemusnah, Percaya atau Pencinta?

UNTITLED...a wise man once said

"love has to be natural
it has to be....u know...suitable
its like finding a shoe
when u wear a shoe,
when its comfortable..
suits your feet
u'll be walking naturally
u'll feel like u're not wearing any shoes cause
its so comfortable
like u walking on air
but if u get the shoe one size smaller
or one size bigger
tak selesa la bila berjalan
betul tak?
so
choosing a partner to start a relationship
mmg penting
Paling penting, no compromise
no thinking will be ok, no thinking can adjust
when its comfortable and natural...
thats the right feeling,
but when u're not feeling it
and u tergerak hati...
do not compromise it,
nanti susah"

quoted from abg ee, dinners at kak fyd's hous

worddd....

UNTITLED...a give from a father to her daugther

Dear Papa,
I am happy...
huhuhuhu....
y?
me bought the set already
the best part
its cheap
huhuhu
actually didi was the one who help me chip in
although its just RM35.95
huhuhu...
she says i'm weird
asyeeq says i'm weird
because literally, i jump in joy when i say it
i was so exicited
like a baby found a lollipop
even the cd shop girl was laughing when they see the act
wateva...
huhuhu
i got it...

The Greatest Collection-Studio Gibli present

huhuhu...grin

and i remember the 1st time u bought the cd home and we watch it

Princess Mononoke...

then comes Spirited Away

and oh i'm greatful to have you as my dad

Lurv u always

xoxoxo
Syasya

UNTITLED...come together

fuck the net
fucking human connections konon
and in these days is what they say
"how people connected to each other"
fuck it
go see u real frens
lepak
go visit
even once a year
thats human connection
real frens konon
fuck the net
old fashion visit n chat is what people need these days

ask you-guys self

who are your real frens?

figures...

bila dunia karam terus malap
duduk kamu sorang dalam gelap
tiada kawan dtg menanya
tiada teman datang berbicara
baru saat itu kamu tersedar
sahabat tiada, dunia hiba

UNTITLED....starts by being free, but ends by being bitter

today,
to my surprise
i saw me cousin again
surprise?
lets just say
i'm the sort of cousin who u rarely meet
sometimes for 6 month, 5 years, even 9
and i'm not kidding
reason being i'm always missing in action
balik kg, tak balik
balik raya, tak balik raya
gi melawat, tak g melawat
biasa la...me busy with what ever suppose to make me busy
oh, back to me story
the cousin was surprise to see me
well...me also
we went to mamak..and chat
my god its been ages
and i thought i was an alien in the family
as in, me didnt remember names of aunts and uncles
or visit them
and yet, he also was in the same case

then memories came...

how when we were little,
we use to play together
with any other cousins

my gramps is the
only elderly in the family
the last one
so people come and lepak, sleep over

and suddenly

how i missed it
when me bro and i
my sis n our cousins
lepak together
back then
there was no astro
no internet
no ps,psp or advance games

just kids playing around with anything we could possible play with
we let our imagination do its tricks and wonders

and oh how i missed it

Thank you Johar for making me remember the good old days
and how i appreciate it more then i will ever be
walking back from the mamak, i realize i was in a faraway land

a land of memories
of childhood years

ultraman
gaban
ja-jan
cik-ke-des
and other lots

such a nice feeling

and yet growing up got the best of it
growing up took the memories away
and make me forget
even worst
make me bitter

Thank you Johar
again

you're the bomb...
see u again couz
till then
take care

dan anak anak kecil
lari keriangan
minda suci,hati tenang

tiada benci, sedih jangan
cuba terbang, suka berangan

jangan cepat dewasa
aku pesan

kalau mahu cepat tua
nescaya, kamu menyesal

UNTITLED...please bring miss gajah back

wrote some words

draw some pictures

mail it with an elephant

the reason i bought the bracelet isnt because i wanna wear it,
but because there was an elephant, and it remind me of u
i remember the 1st time u call me gajah
and i remember y i called u tikus

i dunno what to say...
i dunno what to do...
its 2.04 am in da morning,
and i'm missing you

please i beg of u come back safely
bring back the elephant
together with my heart,baby...

emuahhhhhhhhhhh...

till then,
have fun in tasmania
kidnap a tasmanian devil
and named it fluffy k.

gud luck baby,
may you have a blast time there
study smart
and dunt be naugthy
for i shall do the same
and wait till the day we can soar again

yum yum yum

sayang aku, tiada yg tahu,
sayang kamu, itu yg ku mahu....

UNTITLED...a song kept coming in me head

1st day of the year
went inside the car
turn on the radio
1st song to be heard by me in the new year
weird as it...
and such coinsidence it is..
it was on your blog also for year 2010

well...
call it fate..
call it wat eva it is

its a nice song
in fact
its a yummy song

to you
to me
to me dad
to me bro's
to me family
to all of us



“And the moment that you wonder far from me,
I wanna pull u in my arms again….”

UNTITLED....white flag has been seen

starts 10.32pm

Dear love,
as in right now
u're on the way back to your hometown
in the bus,either sleeping,
or just listening, or playing games in your ipod
why am i'm writing to you
is because i have a thousands word inside my mind
full of emotions
love,sadness
hate,happiness
sentence by sentence
words by words

i went to baby,the cat
i told him
"yes, i miss him"

i went to the fridge and open it
i said this
"I was in heaven,playing with clouds,
and now i'm on earth, and in dirt"

i choose not to cry
i choose not to think
i choose to just let it go

and yet tears runs when i think of u
memories appears when things remind me of u

I miss you
oh so dearly

i miss u
oh so much

words to discribe us
meow
yum yum
wof wof
tikus
gajah
and many more

things that is about us
raju
top gear
lazy
movies
smelly
and much more

I have to tell u the truth
I say prayer every day
In the car
In the kitchen
Going to work
Walking down to the parking lot
and all the prayers will sound the same

"Dear God,
The Almighty, and has showned me how,
by taking him away from me,
I humble down to you"

day by day,
I practise patience
day by day
I practise silence

when my work place ask
when my family ask
when my frens ask

"are you with somebody?"
"is there anybody that u serious with?"
"bf?"

I would say
"nop"
"he's just a fren"
"nobody serious"

but u know the fact
and my true frens would see i'm head over heels for u

I LOVE YOU
I write this down
I MISS YOU
My pride has fallen now

end 12.05am

UNTITLED...not to sleep

i choose
not to sleep
y
dunno..
just for fun
so
tell me a bit about me self
yup yup yup
we all wanna know
well
i'm into music
photography
poems
art
and the whole bunch lots
me liky jazz
yum yum yum
me thinks
sade
miss hill
duffy
and numerious other 'music goddess'
are the bomb
kaboommmmmmmmm
yummy guys
jt
rob thomas
stone sour guy
mr flower from killers
and all the monkeys with gifted music talents
are the ultimate
me only holiday gateway
is by the beach
no beach
no holiday
yup yup yup
me misses him
very much
status?
dunno wat to say
but we love each other
thats for sure
me very much into, deeply, eating
chocolate covered hazelnut
just now had also
it God's gift we shud enjoy
me believe in other side
yup yup yup
me have to
me frens are all various walks of life
but me believe
true frens are the one who stayed with u longer
and u meet them up
go yam cha
at least 3 month one time
me believe in marriage
but me dunt believe that men can commit to it
terkejut?
then ask ur self
u ready?
if not
it'll be forever
me believe that no matter what situation
ur family is the 1st
no matter how unperfect it will be
believe me
family is 1st
me got a crazy mom
a bomb nenek
2 irritating brother
3 so different from each other sister
and yet
me cant leave them alone
me tried
but cant
me have to stay with them
so
get aisyah
get the whole circus
aight?
me best fren is fatimah
me misses her
very much
sound weird,
nop
its frens
u dun understand
then u dun have frens
u marry me
get fatimah oso
hohohoho
well
its wtf 6am in the morning
me better sleep
or else
panda bear will come to work tommorow
throwing tantrums at all the lil ponys at work
in a magical land far away
ruled by a coffee kingdom
ayoyoyoyo...
me need sleep already
nity nite

and see u in kapasland love

UNTITLED...being sick in the mind

the docs told me i'm having that stupid eating disorder...
the bolimia shit whateva u call it
the thing is
me?
the girl who like to eat?
come on...
this girl eats alot
name it man...
tako tao
raju
kam kee
little penang
nasi lemak babi
223
name it...
i'll go there and eat
but eating diorder?
yup...i have it
they trying to find the cause
or
they already found it...
its just uncertain
they say its work
i work to much
hmmm
work is the only thing i have
u take that away
then i dun have anything
really nothing
except me stomach
now
they also wanna take away that
sigh...
i guess its about time
time to find another passion
not work
not eating
but something
sigh....

UNTITLED....words most missed

When me think of u, me smile
When me ponder about u, me happy

No matter where, no matter when

If u’re sad, just bear in mind
Me heart is still with you
And it will always be..<3

UNTITLED.....things happen when u ask for it, although u never intend on it

Gaduh dua pihak, si cinta dan si rindu
Mahu tahu akan keputusan
Yang hanya si hati boleh menjawab
Mahu ditanya, siapa di hati si hati

“Siapa?”

Jawab si hati….

“tiada siapa…”

?

“kerna kalau kamu di dalam hati si hati, maka tidak kamu berdiri di depan mata”

Duduk kamu berdua, patutnya di dalam hati
Tak perlu di tanya, atau diperhati
Kalau sangsi datang bertanya
Maka dengan itu, kamu sudah tidak percaya

Aku tunggu kamu panggil bicara
Walau hati ini sedih sengsara

UNTITLED....a daughter,a mother, and a granmom

Women in my family are very…..i dunno how to explain it. We’re just too rough on the outside, but inside, I believe that we’re just a fragile human being, any woman would be.

They show their “I dunt care, none of me business” attitudes sometimes. Even worse, they sometimes just raise their voice for no reason, and start to fight with each other because one just doesn’t see the purpose of talking it through. And yes…it’s been happening since God knows when. But if u looked closely, you’ll be surprise at what u discover.

Why am I saying this, well, for 3 days I’ve been going back and forth from me gramps house.

Me mom and gramps hates it when I ulang alik from work. They say membazir, even scolded me for no reason making me feel that “lebih baik aku tak yah balik, lagi senang” sometimes.

But at nite,

me gramps sleeps beside me, pull my blanket to cover me, put my bantal beside me and turn the fan on if she sees me started to move.

Me mom comesin the room, look at me and usap me forehead and talks to me…

And as always, I just pretend to be asleep…because if I dunt, they will stop and just pretend to be sleeping or walkaway.

The picture above is when we were at the park, eating ice cream, together. The worst was we were piss of at each other at the moment. The best is that we can just sit there and wait, together.

Thank you…=)


On the other hand…

Its 11.30pm..u said u’ll be home by 10, no msg nor call. And I’m still waiting…

UNTITLED...words upon a dream

bila ku jatuh tidur
dalam gelap ada alam
pada bicara sang bulan dan bintang
pada matangnya sang mata
bicara dipandang
mahu kesana, bukan senang

mungkin juga sebabnya rindu
mungkin juga sebabnya sayang
pada dia, ku terbang bertuju,
pada kita, mahu terbang melayang

jatuh gaung aku, pergi ke situ
jatuh hati aku, sayang tak tentu

bagi ku ubat segera
bagi ku lena tertera

mari kita pergi bersama
lari pantas, kita berdua

UNTITLED...wishing the best of happiness

UNTITLED...a letter of small words to him

and i miss you too